Golden Girls… Blanche: Sophia, I decided to wear this gold chain nestling ever so cunningly in my cleavage. What other accessories do you think I need? Sophia: Implant! After the Golden Girls, I called my mom… Mom: So, your cousin and his girlfriend were making out a few times. Me: How did you know? Mom: They [...]
May
29
May
28
Joan Rivers Says
Category: How Rude | Leave a Comment
“If you’re going to wear assless chaps, then shave your ass. How many more times do I have to say this to the lesbian community?”
May
22
An Extra Large Pop Corn with 3 Gallons of Butter And a Diet Pepsi Please
Category: Story | Leave a Comment
X: I just had my cholesterol checked. Me: All good? X: No. I am devastated. 248. Apparently, I eat too much fatty food. Me: I had mine done in the hospital. Just got my results back a few weeks ago. 208. Borderline high, they said, and suggested that I changed my diet. I hardly eat [...]
May
20
That Is Not What I Meant
Category: How Rude | Leave a Comment
Thanks, Laura.
May
19
X: Hellaw. How can I help you? Me: I need to make a change of my address. X: Cerdenly. I can help you. What is your account numbah? …… Me: My new address is 555 39th Place west… X: AW-Keh. Your addrrrrress is 555 Verrrry Nice Place West… Me: No. Not [...]