Where have you been?

My laptop crashed.  I got the blue screen of death twice, so I decided to call the tech support.

For two hours?

I know.  First, they said that my security patch was not up to date.  They updated it which took forever.  It didn’t work.  So they escalated my call to “level 4″ support.  Whatever that means.  Basically, for the rest of the two hours, I rebooted my machine 5 or 6 times.  Then, the blue screen went away.  Gone.  Sayonara.  auf Wiedersehen.

Is that it?  Just rebooting your laptop for two hours?

Yes!  It’s the best way to fix any computer problem.  REBOOT, REBOOT, REBOOT!

That’s so sad.

That’s not too bad.  Something is worse.

More problem with your ‘puter?

Before I saw the blue screen of death, I sent an email to “friends” of mine and asked them to entertain me because I was dying.  I WAS BORED TO THE TEETH.  At least, I thought they were “friends” of mine.  Guess how many emails I got back after I was gone for two hours?

Fifty?

EIGHT!  Three of them were from you asking me where I was.  The other five were not worth reading at all.  None of them replied and sent me funnies or gossips.

Nobody likes you.

THANK YOU!  I might as well go kiss a pig and get the pig influenza.