L:  So you coming to Iceland with me next year?

Me:  No.

L:  How rude!

Me:  Damn right, because  you use tripadvisor and talk to cheapies.

L:  Hahahaha…

“[rookie] Q:  What is the cheapest way to get to the hotel from the airport in Iceland?”

“[Elite cheapie] A:  Don’t take taxis.  It’s a rip-off.  Walk out of the baggage claim then throw yourself in the middle of the road.  Pretend to be unconscious.  Then you can get to the hospital on an ambulance for free.  Once there, explain to them you are just a poor lonely tourist that they should take you back to the hotel for free too.”