Callie, the dog:  How come you kept putting that damn cat on your blog, but not me? Me:  Shush!  Silly goose.  You shouldn’t speak of Her Royal Highness like that.  Besides, we are just unworthy peasants.  I’ll try to sneak you in tonight and do a story for you on my blog. Miss Meow Meow [...]

Miss Meow Meow’s gentleman friend:  “I really don’t like to be disturbed when I am watching Real Housewives from New York.  Well, if you can excuse me, don’t look!  I am going to scratch you-know-where.  Oh, by the way, Carl, I have a message for you from my darling, Her Royal Highness…” Dear Carl Unworthy [...]

Dear Carl Peasants, Did you know I almost died today?  “Why?” you asked.  I was using my royal bathroom and I had to hold my breath for 5 minutes.  That’s why.  First, what did you put in my food to cause my pooping difficulty?  Second, clean the royal bathroom.  I almost died in there because [...]

It’s easy to change my address with the JC Penny customer care too. Image originally appeared on shof.msrcsites.co.uk

Originally appeared on my.mmoabc.com